Ok, so maybe we’re a day late in professing our love for you. But we promise to make it up to you baby! You see, we needed the extra day to make sure that we got you exactly what we wanted to get you to show you just how we feel. What? No! I did not run out to the bodega before you woke up and grab a bunch of clearance stuff because you got mad last night! These are my real feelings.
I mean, if the song “Crazy Love, Vol. III” doesn’t describe what we have together perfectly, than I don’t know what does! After all, I *am* your Mister Heavenly, right? Right!?! Hey baby, where ya going?
Ok… admittedly I have no idea what a “Cernubicua” is (I’m assuming Chris Carter does though), but it sure sounded fancy. And you, my love, are FANCY!
Look, I even got you your favorite flowers! “Carnations!” What’s that? “Carnations are the cheapest flowers known to man and no one’s favorites” you say? I know that! Hahahahaha. I got them to be… uh… funny!
You said you were worried about ants in the Parlour, didn’t you? What’s wrong with a box of “Resist Ants” for Valentines Day? Hmmm? It MEANS I’M LISTENING, RIGHT?
Ok. Well I know you’re gonna love this last present. It’s the ! You can take it with you! I know you love to listen to music on the train. What’s that? You say that I’m just trying to pass off work stuff as Valentine’s Day stuff?
Be my Valentine,
John